Self-regulation is the ability to manage your thoughts, emotions and behaviours – to stay in control, even when things aren’t going well for you.
And to effectively self-regulate, you need to be aware of your behaviours – sometimes this can be challenging.
Habits are an example of people acting without always being aware of what they’re doing. An example of a habit may be biting your nails, grinding your teeth, or giving up when things become challenging.
But not all habits are bad – an example of a good habit is exercising regularly.
What other good habits can you think of?
For example; cleaning your teeth, eating well, being polite, etc.
Being mindful is noticing what is happening around you, how you think and how you react. It involves your perceptions, thoughts, emotions and behaviours.
People who can self-regulate are usually more mindful, and think about:
• what they are doing
• what they hope to achieve
• what strategies they could use to self-regulate
Investigate the concept of mindfulness and its benefits.
They realise that losing self-control (failing to self-regulate) could disadvantage them and others.
People who are not able to maintain self-control may not fully consider the consequences of failing to regulate their thoughts, emotions and behaviours. Or, if they do, they think about the consequences when it is too late, and the damage has already been done.
Have you ever noticed how a tired two-year-old behaves when they’re not given something they want?
No wonder when people lose control (fail to self-regulate) some say they are ‘behaving like a two year old’.
Self-regulation is a skill you can develop with practice over time. These strategies could assist you to better self-regulate (stay in control), including:
• understanding better what is likely to trigger your need to self-regulate
• recognising when you could be at risk of losing control
• thinking before you act
• acting in line with your values/principles
• after you act, thinking about what you could have done differently or better.
Self-regulation allows you to consistently demonstrate the behaviours required to achieve your goals.
On a scale of 1-10 – how well do you self-regulate?
How could you to increase your ability to self-regulate to achieve your goals?